My Last Huzzah

confessions-of-a-college-freshmen-2

And so it goes.

There. I did it. I began this last of many Confessions of a College Freshman, a task which 2012-Me recognized as a task that would have to be done many lifetimes from my August days. Many lifetimes? I now laugh outright at the thought. This freshman year, as my elders predicted, has been a blink. Or maybe half of one.

“And so it goes.” That has to be one of the most awkward ways of beginning any blog entry. The reader is left to puzzle it over – and so WHAT goes? Where is “it” going? Where is “it” coming from? Is she being figurative? What is “it”? And WHERE IS IT GOING?

I’m sorry to puzzle you, reader. Well, I’m half sorry. My un-sorry half shrugs off your temporary bafflement with the knowledge that it was inevitable. Any start to this article was bound to be ramble-tastic, potentially even awkward. And, as my fingers dawdle over the keyboard and my Times New Roman font skitters helter-skelter across the page, I am confirming my prediction. Here is a healthy helping of my finals week ramblings, with a side of good cheer.

I am at the end of my freshman here, 6 days away from my last final. My room is already packed away with only the essential study materials and Ultimate Frisbee garb left within reach. Plans have been made for my “Last Huzzah” – a trip with friends on my birthday weekend to the nearby lake, where merry times will be had by all. Stress? I don’t have much. This semester has been good to me in the most absurd way and, dare I say it, I see a 4.0 galloping toward me across the finals week horizon? My cup is half full.

Because my DAYS are full.

I wonder, if you had asked me several months ago, if I could have guessed what revelation would find me by the time I sat here with my first year of college packed haphazardly into boxes. My guess? No. The souveniors of my days well-spent would not exist. And so, surely, I could have no way of telling you that by simply filling my time, my life has reached the stratosphere, where Cloud 9 is visible many leagues down below.

Consider the relics… the magazines and newspapers collected in a heap with my byline featured – truly an honor – in every one. The battered Ultimate Frisbee discs that now rest as a testament to days spent perfecting techniques and making indescribably magnificent friendships in sun and rain, hail and snow. The collection of concert programs and ticket stubs from recitals, Chorale concerts, football games, Elie Wiesel’s visit, and other truly once-in-a-lifetime events. And, of course, the hundreds of miles covered by my first love: my bike.

A brief recap on time: It only moves in one direction. It only moves at one pace (well, until you reach the speed of light but that’s something my Physics teacher will have to boggle you with later). It is absolutely priceless. And my advice, as I fling myself headlong and grinning into my summer, is to not waste a moment of it.

Now, that does NOT mean to immediately ink up your schedule and try to cram as many social events and vacations as humanly possible into the coming months. Those are a blast, as any college student could tell you. The month of May alone holds for me many scripted hours of job training – I may just earn the job of a Zip Line Tour Guide, right up my tree-climbing alley! – and a long-awaited trip to attend my beau’s A-school graduation from the Navy. Sometimes, knowing where you’re headed can be more than just ink on the calendar. They can be a finish line.

So, why do I hesitate to suggest Calendar-Cramming as a newfound pastime? Because one of the most rewarding ways in which I saturated my time during the last few weeks was to fall off the grid. Music in my ears, peddles obligingly taking my feet to wherever they eagerly spun. Laying under a bridge next to the river… Does my life sound like a novel yet? Sometimes I wonder if someone is flipping the pages of my life, my animation their delight.

My point is that time can be full in any number of ways. Full of games. Full of laughter. Full of mischief. Full of solitude. Full of productivity (only every once in a rare finals week). Full of rest. No one of these is better than the other? For those of you who like an extra bit of Crazy to spice up their day, enjoy! But don’t scoff at the resting because you will join them in just a matter of time.

The content of time’s fullness is never the same two moments in a row, and shouldn’t be. But one thing is constant. The idea that if you could take a second, hold it in your hand and fill it to the brim, you would drink deeply from the plenty that life has to offer.

I know, I know. Hannah, why do you have time to ponder over things like the depths of time when you have finals upcoming and emails to answer? Surely the philosophizing (a word I cannot say out loud to this day – Try it. I dare you.) can wait?

You’re right. Time is tick-tocking along and I have some midnight Frisbee to catch. Nope, not finals just yet. But I hope you find fullness to your time and approach every countdown with the mindset that the time until The Big Day is not to be wished away or wasted. After all, time flies when you’re having fun.

… And so it goes.

P.S. Find good people. I don’t know if this exactly fit with the rambling/time theme I had going on in the above paragraphs, but it needs saying. Find. Good. People. Not just persons. But the kind of people that make you excited to wake up every day to find new ways of touching their lives as a way of thanking them for the wonderful little nugget of humanity that they bring to your life. A huge shoutout to all those humanity-nuggets in my life, and especially to my Ultimate Team, my Cornell-bound roommate, all the people that make a house a Home, and to all huggers everywhere.

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